The State of California is planning “Reagan Day”. If I understand correctly, this is a holiday where we all max out our credit cards, give guns to the local mosque, have sex with a person we call “Mommy”, and then fall asleep and forget all about it the next day. Here’s the full story:
California is one step closer to establishing an annual day honoring Ronald Reagan, the former president, governor and actor.
The state Senate on Thursday unanimously passed a bill designating Feb. 6 as Ronald Reagan Day. It encourages schools to spend the day commemorating Reagan’s life and accomplishments.
The legislation, which heads to the Assembly, is one of three Reagan-themed bills Republican lawmakers hope to pass before Feb. 6, 2011. That would have been the 100th birthday of the conservative icon, who died in 2004.
Ronald Reagan Day would be the third special day of recognition in California dedicated to an individual.
The first honors conservationist John Muir. Last year, lawmakers honored Harvey Milk, a gay activist and former San Francisco supervisor who was gunned down at city hall in 1978.
Ya’ know, I think this may be pretty accurate for most guys who’ve been married as long as I have, but I think I’d personally enjoy a “Clinton Day”. If you know what I mean…
Today is Easter, the holiest day of the year for Christians. Today we celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ, the Son of God. So of course the first thought on my mind when I woke this morning was “how about a new list”.
I started to make a list of the 10 most popular Lent misconceptions. I know, boring… So then I thought I’d try to get to the true meaning of Easter with my list. On the first Easter Mary Magdalene witnessed the miracle of Christ’s return after crucifixion. Today, many confused and misinformed Christians of, let’s say, decreased mental capacity, often see Jesus’ return sometimes daily. So how about…
A List of the top places Jesus apparently likes to make an appearance:
And the Number 1 Jesus sighting on our 2010 Easter List:
1.) Jesus in Your Dog’s Butt. Seriously, he’s everywhere.
Well there you have it. Maybe next time I’ll try a list of places Mary likes to make appearances, like in the hair I found stuck to my shower drain. Just take a look for yourself:
By the way, is it just me or does it seem like a disproportionate number of these sightings happen here in Texas? I think that must be what they mean when they say “God Bless Texas”.
Today I’m starting a new category called “WTF”. Whenever I see something that makes me say WTF, I’ll post it here so I can ask myself “WTF?” whenerver I’m in a WTF kinda’ mood.
By the way, in case you were wondering, WTF stands for “What The Fudge”. At least for today.
“How the fudge you gonna get a scar like this eating pineapple, man?” Enjoy:
Adorable. I bet the chainsaw scene was absolutely precious. LINK
I’ve been a fan of Leo Laporte for years, actually for over a decade now. From the old Screen Savers and Call for Help shows back in the nineties to the Tech TV days, the This Week in Tech podcast and Tech Guy Labs – Leo Laporte is the man when it comes to technology news and info. Sadly, he’s not on TV in the US anymore (at least not at the moment) but you can still find him on Twitter, The Lab with Leo, on syndicated radio doing the Tech Guy Labs show, and of course at TWiT.
This past weekend Leo got an interesting phone call from a women who has been stealing Wi-Fi for over a year and a half. She was actually dim enough to call up and complain that her “Linksys” had disappeared.
Perhaps the only thing more pathetic than giving up on your new blog after only 5 short months, is crawling back after a 5 year hiatus to try and start over. Actually, I suppose one thing even more pathetic would be quitting on your short lived blog because you were so insanely pissed at the political climate you could no longer think straight.
Even though I know nobody reads this thing but me, I am still embarrassed at many things I said here back in 05’. I’m not embarrassed because I think I was wrong, not at all. In fact I still believe very strongly that former President Bush was a disastrous president for America, and I am still disgusted that America re-elected him for a second destructive term. My embarrassment however, is because this was supposed to be a blog about my family and our day to day lives – but instead I allowed it to morph into a place where I would regularly vent my anger at the Bush administration (far more often than I even mentioned anything to do with my family).
I’m going to try and keep my political rants to a minimum this time. Wish me luck.
A lot has happened since my last blog post in 2005. The biggest news story of 05 was, of course, Hurricane Katrina. This was probably the final straw that put me over the top concerning the Bush administration and ultimately led to me bailing on this blog altogether. Katrina was Bush F-up # 1,894,672 and I had decided to step back from my blog and take a break – that lasted 5 years. Anyway, I’m not gonna’ get into Katrina right now or else I will have to start taking blood pressure meds.
Other big news in 2005, Pope John Paul II died, John Roberts was sworn in as Chief Justice of the Supreme Court and Lewis “Scooter” Libby, Dick Cheney’s Chief of Staff, agreed to take the bullet for his boss and was indicted for perjury and obstruction of justice. Of course this national traitor was all but pardoned by Bush, er, must…keep…blood…pressure…in…check. On the plus side, in 2005 my family and I took our first ever Staycation, looooong before they became trendy with the global economic collapse three years later.
In 06’ another criminal in Bush’s cabinet was forced to resign, this time Donald Rumsfeld (I’m not doing as well as I had hoped, regarding staying on the topic of my family and daily life). 2006 was a bad year overall for Republicans as several Republican congressmen were brought down by scandals, including Mark Foley, who resigned over sexually explicit messages sent to underage boys, and Randy Cunningham, who pleaded guilty to accepting bribes from defense contractors. House Majority Leader and Good Ol’ Texas Boy Tom Delay resigned after being indicted on campaign finance charges, and Ohio’s Bob Ney pleaded guilty in connection with the probe of lobbyist Jack Abramoff. Plus, Dick Cheney shot his friend in the face while on a canned hunt. Then the Democrats all but swept the mid-term elections. Yea, you could say that 2006 was a bad year for the Red Team.
In family news, 2006 was an incredible year as I became a home-school parent. Home schooling a child is probably the most difficult thing I’ve ever done, although my daughter is a great student which probably makes it a lot easier on me than it could be. You can expect to see many posts on this topic coming soon as it has become a huge part of my life.
In 2007 O.J. finally went to jail, Miss S.Carolina needed grammar lessons, the Vatican told us that good Catholics don’t use their cell phones while driving, and Brainspout was temporarily shut down for excessive bandwidth usage (which was very weird since, at that time, I hadn’t posted anything in over 2 years) because several other popular websites started linking to a couple of pictures on this site (THIS ONE and THIS ONE). Also, 2007 was the year when everyone in America started talking about something called a “housing bubble”. Hmmm, wonder what a housing bubble is? More to come…
In 2007 my daughters pet dachshund had to be put to sleep, which was a very difficult day for everyone. On a more positive note, Christmas morning of 2007 we surprised our kids with a trip to Disneyland. This would be the first of three Disney trips in less than 2 years. Does that mean we’re addicted? Probably.
In 2008 the era of Reaganomics finally came to an end as the World Economy went right down the crapper, President Bush popularized the term “Bail Out” by helping a few more friends before he left office, and then America elected, basically, “anybody but Bush”.
I’m not belittling the monumental event that was the 2008 Presidential Election. For the first time in our nation’s history an African-American was elected President of the United States – a truly historic moment. Barack Obama ran a masterful campaign with the messages of Hope and Change. Unfortunately, just like waiting on the cashier at McDonald’s, who is rendered helpless because she can’t find that little picture of a BigMac on her keyboard, a year later and I’m still Hoping for some Change.
I honestly believed that after the hell Bush put this country through, whoever won the Democratic nomination would win this election. John McCain made it all the easier by running a dishonest and inept campaign (very much like the Democrats usually do), finally sealing his fate by selecting an unknown, unqualified punch-line of a running mate from Alaska. Talk about a slam dunk for the Blue Team.
Ahhh, there I go again, DARNIT!
On the bright side, the US economic crash enabled me to buy a new car at 0% interest, so it all worked out in the end. Right?
As for myself in 2009, full of hope that Obama would bail me out, I throw caution to the wind and buy a new house that is far too big and expensive for us. Not to worry, I voted for Obama so I’m sure my bail-out check will be here soon… All kidding aside, we actually did qualify for an $8,000 tax credit, which of course means I did the American thing and am now a proud owner of a big screen TV. I call it my Obama TV. Don’t look at me that way, buying that TV was good for our economy. Plus my hockey games look sooooo good on it.
Alright, it’s painfully obvious that I’m destined to fail in my comeback attempt to steer clear of political land mines, but I’m still gonna’ give it a shot. Also, I’ll try to add a few blog posts covering stuff I missed the last few years, and I promise to do my best to stay on track and focus on my day to day life and family while not mentioning anything to do with politics at all. =) Yea, right.
“George Bush doesn’t care about black people”. – Kanya West
That’s what he said, on live TV. I waste entirely too much of my time bashing Bush, on this blog and in my own personal life. However, honestly, I doubt that Bush has a problem with any specific race. I think it’s more accurate to say that Bush doesn’t like “poor” people, in fact I’m absolutely convinced of it. Other than so many kids from poor families volunteering for military service, Bush couldn’t care less about poor or middle class Americans.
Having said that, I still support the producers of this video and their message. I’m not a Kanya West fan, but there is absolutely no question whatsoever that if Hurricane Katrina had hit the coast of Connecticut, or the San Francisco coast, or anywhere that isn’t primarily poor (and black) we would have seen a totally different response.
Are Americans as stupid as the rest of the world seems to think we are? According to Katsuaki Watanabe, President of the Toyota Motors Corporation, we are. For years now I’ve read articles containing statistical data claiming we are not only lagging behind other industrialized nations when it comes to education, but that many areas of the United States are actually ranked poorer than some third-world nations. I don’t know if I believe that or not, but I do know that the worldwide perception of the lazy, uneducated American is being propagated more vigorously with a president like George W. Bush calling the shots.
“The level of the workforce in general is so high that the training program you need for people, even for people who have not worked in a Toyota plant before, is minimal compared to what you have to go through in the southeastern United States,” said Gerry Fedchun, president of the Automotive Parts Manufacturers’ Association. Several U.S. states were reportedly prepared to offer more than double the amount of subsidy offered in Canada, but Fedchun said much of that extra money would have been eaten away by higher training costs.
“The educational level and the skill level of the people down there is so much lower than it is in Ontario,” Fedchun said. Nissan and Honda have encountered difficulties getting new plants up to full production in recent years in Mississippi and Alabama due to an untrained – and often illiterate – workforce. For example, in Alabama, trainers had to use “pictorials” to teach some illiterate workers how to use high-tech plant equipment.
This article rips into many issues, perceptions and/or stereotypes like:
A) Southerners are, in general, uneducated.
B) National health care makes our country significantly less attractive to foreign investors.
C) The same asshats that voted for Bush appear to be the same people who are uneducated.
Seriously, look at the two maps below. The first is a map of the United States where the population has less than 9 years of education. The second map is a red state vs. blue state map of the 2004 presidential election results. I found the uncanny similarities of these two maps absolutely hilarious, and frankly – not at all surprising.
If you could superimpose these two map images over each other the red states would still be red, for the most part. It appears that, at least in the 2004 run for president, election results and educational level goes hand in hand here in the gool old US of A…
President Bush is doing everything he can to turn us into a third world country with nuclear weapons, er, sorry, I mean “nucular“. This article is a sign of why things must change in the United States if we are to remain a so-called superpower. It’s bad enough that we bully other countries without cause or provocation, but now we’re also a bunch of uneducated idiots.
I don’t want to be “that guy“. That guy always gets killed at the end of the movie.
You gotta’ be kiddin’ me!
You tryin’ to tell me THIS GUY ain’t smart enough to build them thar Toyota’s?
1. The urinal buffer zone – Guys will often stand one urinal away from the next guy when going in a public bathroom. Is it because we are scared some guy may look over at our johnson or do we just not want to get our pants lag pissed on?
2. The race – Sometimes I will flush the toilet right as I start to pee. I try to race the toilet to see if I can finish before the water completely flushes, in part so nobody hears my pee splashing into the water but primarily just to win the race.
3. The porcelain mute – While peeing, if you aim for the porcelain inside the toilet instead of the water, it makes a lot less noise. Does anyone else do this or is it just me?
4. The urinal puck – When peeing in a urinal that has one of those deodorant soap bars at the bottom, it’s fun to pee on the edge of it to make it move. I’m a hockey fan and I like saying “He shoots, he scores” as I scoot the urinal puck along.
5. The little kids ass – Usually little kids don’t know how to use the zipper or the little flap through the underwear, so they’ll pull their pants all the way down to their ankles while standing on their tip-toes and using the urinal. So often times, you’ll walk into the bathroom and get an eye full of some little kid’s ass. Try not to laugh…
6. Watering the plants – When peeing outside near a plant, I don’t usually pee just around the plant or at the base of it. For some reason I feel an uncontrolable urge to cover the entire plant in urine… no idea why. Perhaps some primative instinct to mark my territory.
7. The melt – When peeing in a urinal that has ice in it, it is (for some reason) fun to see how much ice you can melt before you’re finished. Bonus points if you melt all of the ice…
Comments Off 
Perhaps the only thing more pathetic than giving up on your new blog after only 5 short months, is crawling back after a 5 year hiatus to try and start over. Actually, I suppose one thing even more pathetic would be quitting on your short lived blog because you were so insanely pissed at the political climate you could no longer think straight.
Entries (RSS)